Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Closet Remodel (I am TEEN?!?)

A scary realization has slowly been seeping through the crusty sponge that it is my reluctant-to-change mind.  To my mind-sponge's credit (what even is this metaphor?), it did a good job of resisting said realization, but alas! it has finally been soaked.

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The realization is this: I am teen.

I am not old-lady-Jenny who used to wear cardigans and sip tea literally all the time.  I thought that I was different from other people and could resist the teen-phase.

I used to look at teens and literally think "those whippersnappers!"  I used to be so confident in myself that I never thought about what other people think about me (wow, look at the grammar of that sentence).  But now...?  Now, I am teen!

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I got rid of all my nightgowns because I figured that was pretty weird for a teenager.  Younger Jenny would probably say "but who cares, they are comfortable and you're just sleeping!"  Yes, BUT THIS JENNY CARES.  This Jenny wants to fit in.  She wants to wear cool pajamas even though no one will see them.

This Jenny listens to music more than she reads.  Just let that sink in.

A lot of this may have to do with the fact that school has really picked up and my mind is fried by the end of the day, but it's still a shocking realization.

Jenny has a crush on a boy from school.  Old Jenny thought that was a huge waste of time that could not matter less.  New Jenny cannot control herself and needs to DIAL IT DOWN.

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I don't know how this happened, but slowly over the past few months, I've been realizing that slowly but surely I've been morphing into a teenager and changing from my weird old-lady ways.  Who am I?

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This all came to a head Sunday when I finally pulled the desk out of my closet in my room.  It'd been in there for as long as the room had been mine, and it was just another reminder of how odd I was--my closet wasn't used for clothes like most people's, but was just used for more studying.

But I haven't used the desk in awhile, and so I tore it out.  It had been wedged in there before the closet doors were put on, so I had to literally tear it apart in order to pull it out.  Now my closet is full of clothes.  Teen clothes.

The forsaking of a desk for more room for clothes perfectly manifests the overhaul of my prior personality into this strange new world of teen-stuff.

I mean, it's a natural part of life, right?  It's been a pretty rapid progression from old lady to teenager, but eventually I'll probably wobble out an old lady again.  My personality is probably a parabola to be honest.

Well now that that rant is over, I can show you how I organized my closet!

My room is usually never messy, but teen-Jenny has been getting lazy when it comes to cleaning her room.  It starts with one piece of dirty clothing and snowballs into a huge mob of random stuff.  Two nights ago, I found a five pound dumbbell in my bed.  I had been sleeping with it in my bed and didn't realize until midnight.  And by that point I was too lazy to put it away (I took care of it in the morning).

Things only got worse when I emptied everything from the closet.

So I know what you're thinking!  Dang Jenny, you are actually a slob.  

But really I'm not!  I adore organizing, so I was really excited to get everything put away.  I mean, I spent my Memorial Day weekend cleaning, so that shows just how much I love it.

So why do any of you care about this?  The truth is, you probably don't.  But I think that this whole debacle illustrates something you definitely will care about.

I'm talking about the different stages we go through in our lives when it feels like we don't really know who we are.  This closet and it's organization represents that to me.

Yeah, I have gotten rid of my desk and I'm changing my priority a slight bit to something else.  But deep down I haven't really changed.  I can't be too much of a teen if I still spend my weekends cleaning my room and organizing things.

No matter how much of a stranger you may seem (even to yourself) there is always fundamentally you deep down inside.  As long as you don't lose sight of yourself, you'll be alright and can feel free to embrace change.


  1. haha. I used to use my closet to store a dresser that prevented me from hanging anything on the rod. I also had two dressers. And which one held my clothing? NOT the one in the closet. I have only recently removed all non clothing items from the closet proper, but I do still use the overhead rack for storage of randomness.

    1. Haha wow. Nice to know there are people out there shattering closet expectations in my stead ;)

  2. Thanks for the entertaining post. :D Funny, I'm going through a similar stage of realization right now--I just cleaned out my school bookshelves because I'm going to college next year, and it hit me that I'm done with all of high school. Forever. O.O

    And hey, I named my string instrument too! Is Peter named after a particular person? My cello is named Steve after Steven Sharp Nelson of the Piano Guys.

    1. I'm glad you liked it! Oh wow, finishing high school...I can't even imagine what my last days of senior year will be like. I'm preemptively sad and nostalgic, maybe because I've seen all my siblings go through the end of high school and dissolving of past friendships. Wow now I am going to cry.

      Oh that's an awesome name for a cello! I loooove the Piano Guys! My violins were Peter, Pierre, and now Piotr. They aren't named after anyone specific in their first names, but they are all derrivitives of the name Petrus, only in English, French, and Russian. I wanted a certain theme to them all. Piotr is obviously connected to Tchaikovsky though and each of them had meaningful middle names (which I have forgotten...).

      I'm still thinking of full names for Piotr, as he is new. Maybe Piotr Alexei Sebalius (but that's two Russian names and one Swedish! Aaaa)

      Any suggestions?

    2. Aww, don't cry! *gives awkward hug*

      Cool, you put much more thought into your names than I did--I just thought haha, Steve would be funny, and it was only later that I realized it actually worked for Steven Sharp Nelson. xD

      Hmm, to be honest I've never gotten past the first chapter of a Russian novel so I don't have any Russian name suggestions, but it would be cool to have a Tolkien name in there. Beren, maybe...

  3. Aw! I'm so sad/happy right now! I don't... what? I'm kind of(not really) confused... Mixed feelings here. Not that you admitting that you're a teen is confusing just what you described what makes you a "teen". I'm kind of glad because that must mean that I'm not a teen quite yet which is very comforting. I can tell Peter Pan that I'm not so grown up after all :D

    1. Haha don't worry! Every teen is different-- I was just shocked to see myself turn into something I never thought I would or what I consider stereotypically "teenlike". This post is mainly a humorous recount of recent thoughts of mine so don't take it too seriously XD